TO ALL FRESHPERSONS GOING TO COLLEGE

You can tell from the title of this article that you are heading into the land of political-correctness. Most undergraduate colleges are bastions of PC. PC has served its purpose, but vestiges of it remain. The best ones are about civility; it is not good form to say or do anything to offend another person. The first amendment gives you the right to insult another person, but good manners dictate that you refrain from the impulse, even if it had been second nature in the past.

You will see that there is a wider world than Grosse Pointe. Although Grosse Pointe is one of the best places in the world, you may want to grow out of it. You will, of course, visit regularly and keep in touch with your folks. They conceived you and gave you birth, did not murder you in your infancy, and supported you and guided you to this transitional point. Just as pre-school and kindergarten were your entry into a wider world, college is your entry into an even wider world.

You will no longer be under the scrutiny of your parents. This means that if you want, you can keep your room or space neat and clean and do your own laundry. You can drink beer and smoke pot to your heart's content, but it is not good for your brain, your lungs or your liver. Just because your peer group is going crazy, doesn't mean that you have to be nuts too. Remember the lemmings...

Don't underestimate English 1. That is basic composition, where you, possibly for the first time, can learn to write. Writing is a very valuable skill. It helps you to organize your thoughts and therefore enables you to think better. That is what college is all about, a great opportunity to think better. Thinking better is a lifelong proposition, and English One is a great place to start. It wouldn't hurt to write a one thousand word original theme before you even get to college. Then you can just hand it in, and you will be a leg up on all your classmates.

Don't be afraid to succeed. Don't be afraid of being called a grind or a nerd. If money interests you, remember that the nerd, Bill Gates is one of the richest men in the world, even richer than Michael Jordan or Michael Jackson. But despite what your parents say, you should not just be thinking about making a living or getting a job. They are important considerations, but the most important consideration in your undergraduate years is learning how to learn, exposing yourself to what's out there.

I was lucky enough to have attended the University of Michigan's undergraduate school, which was called, "LS&A". That is Literature, Science and the Arts. That is a triumvirate, a trinity of sorts. Literature is Shakespeare, the Greek Classics, George Bernard Shaw, Byron, Keats and Shelley, Dostoevsky, Tolstoy, Pushkin and Pasternack, Eugene O'Neill, Tennesse Williams and Arthur Miller, Hemingway, Vonnegut, and a host of others. Science includes the behavioral sciences, psychology, sociology and anthropology, biology, micro- and macro-, botany, geology, chemistry and physics; don't forget philosophy and math, they teach logical thinking. And the arts includes the fine arts, painting and sculpture, architecture and design, music, dance, opera. Learning about them is a basis for becoming acculturated and civilized for the rest of your life. Appreciating the arts is a joy.

What a world there is out there! College is a schmorgasbord of courses, all there for the taking. Better to stick with it than drop out. Better to study than to goof off. Better to control your appetites. Date-rape is not allowed anymore. If you are a guy, don't do it; if you are a gal, don't let it happen, don't let yourself get into a situation you can't get out of. Use your senses and cognition to determine who to date and who not to date.

Since hormones are raging, more in males than females, generally, at this point, be responsible, be considerate, be safe. The safest sex is abstinence. There will always be necking and petting; that is foreplay. It is important not to lose control. Never mind being popular; whosoever would be a Person would be a noncomformist. Nowadays the person who marches to a different drummer is careful about his or her sexuality, reserving it for the right time and the right person. No matter what people say, you will be respected if you do that.

Don't get me wrong. It is OK to have fun. Everything in moderation. Study hard and play hard; that is keeping things in balance. Believe it or not, this is one of the best times of your life. The friends you make now you can keep for life, you might even be lucky enough to meet and marry your best friend.

That is the most important decision you will make in your life, the choice of your life-partner. If you make the right choice now, you won't have to divorce later. Nobody can tell you exactly how to do that, but it would help to seek the counsel of trusted elders. Find good people to talk to, talk and listen.

The second most important choice is that of career. It is as important for a woman to have a career as a man. A woman should not feel her education is unimportant because she is going to be a housekeeper, housewife and mother. Parenting requires a good education in any event, but not every person must be a parent. Don't feel you must adopt a career chosen by your family. You must be true to yourself and seek to develop your talents and tastes, whatever they may be. That is the key to happiness and fulfillment.

Most identity-crises in later life come from choosing the wrong mate and wrong career. Think hard and keep a clear head. I strongly advise only moderate alcohol use and no drug use. Most of what they say about marijuana is 'mystique'. It is an inconsistency of our society that alcohol is legal and marijuana is not. Our world would be better off if alcohol were illegal too, but too many people require it for socialization and relaxation, so we are stuck with it.

Good luck and bon voyage! (And don't forget to have fun!)